Weekend Assignment~Pet Story

This is a copy of an earlier journal entry I did about Oreo, our family's cat.  I thought it might be appropriate for Scalzi's Weekend Assignment, so here it is again for those who may have missed it the first time, some months ago.

*YAWN and S-t-r-e-t-c-h*

0730-Me....stumbling out of my warm bed.  Feet covered with fuzzy socks hit the floor......I make my way to the potty.

Oreo: (black and white spoiled female feline, parked outside my bedroom door, waiting impatiently for her breakfast, which is our mornin' routine)

MMMEEEEEEOOOOOOOWWWW (cat speak for "It's about time woman! I have been waiting here alllll night!)

Me: Rolls eyes and thinks....Geeeezzzz....can't I pee in peace!  "JUST a SECOND!"

Oreo: MMMMMeeeeeeeOOOOOOOWWWWWW! (meaning....."I am getting irritated lady!")

Business accomplished, open door and head down the stairs, with Oreo right beside me, neck in neck, heading for the kitchen.

Oreo: Mmmmeeeeeeeyyyooooowwwwwww (OPEN the refrigerator, NOW!)

Me: "SHHHHH! Oreo, everyone's still sleepin'!"

Oreo: MeeeeeeOOOOOWWWWW! ( I don't give a rat's fanny. Where's the tuna?)

Me: Looking in fridge, moving the milk, several styrofoam take-out boxes, and the out-dated cottage cheese......panic.........where's the can of cat food?.......I know I fed her some canned food yesterday morning..........Where is it?

Pulling out the meat drawer...No, not in the meat drawer...silly!

Who'd put cat food in the meat drawer anyway?

Damn, I know it's here somewhere. 

 IT's NOT!

Oreo: MEEEEEOOW MEEEOOOOWWWWW (What do you mean it's not there? Well, I don't like it cold anyway....So, go look in the pantry and get me a fresh can!) Meeeeeoooowwww!

Me: Running to the pantry......thinking this cat is going to really be difficult if I don't find some canned cat food quick......Oh, there's plenty of dry, but NO canned, Arrrggggh.....Oreo will not like this......Heading to back to the kitchen, I grab her water bowl and fill it with fresh water.

Oreo: MMMEEEEEEOOOOW (GAWD, what is taking you soooo long?)

Me: Placing water bowl down in front of Oreo, who sniffs it.......and

Oreo: mmmmmmmmeeeeeooooowwwwwwwwww (WHAT THE HELL???....THAT'S WATER!)

Me: Filling up food bowl......with dry food.....gingerly I set it in front of Oreo and run to my computer!

Oreo: Runs to my computer.....

MMMEEEEEEOOOWWWWWWW (DRY FOOD?   JUST DRY FOOD?....Where's the TUNA???)

Me: "Sorry baby...Momma's soooooo sorry....We're out of canned food...I promise I will go and get you some today! Promise.....Hey, Wanna go out and play in the fresh air? Watch the birdies? Here, lemme get the door sweetie!"

*Opens Door*

Oreo: Runs to door, peeks out, see's NO TUNA and heads back in toward the couch.......the ARM of the couch...stretches out and digs her claws into the fabric.......SCRATCH, SCRATCH, SCRATTTTTCCCHH!

Me: "Hey....Oreo, NO, No, go use your scratching post!" SCRATCH......"No".....*Throwin' a pencil toward her, hoping it will get her attention!

Oreo: MeeeeOOOOOWWWWWW.....*looking over her shoulder as she gets in one last scratch and stretch..........................cat speak for........

Go back to bed...........BITCH!