Krissy

Krissy is my youngest half-sister.  She's now 38, but has always been the baby.  Even after she had a child, she lived at home with our mother and they were two peas in a pod.  Mom was not a good role model and suffered from a variety of ailments, including mental illness.  Neither of them held a job and I don't know they managed, but they lived on a steady diet of greasy fast food, sugary soda and cigarettes. 

About 10 years ago, when she was just 58 years young; my mom died suddenly as a result of respiratory arrest.  Not surprising considering the constant smoking.  After her death Krissy just seemed to fall apart emotionally and physically.  She began using drugs and lost custody of her teenage son due to the drugs and neglect.  She became homeless and at one point we even filed a Missing Person's Report with the police because we couldn't find her.  We were certain she was dead, but thankfully that wasn't the case.  But she could have been considering the circumstances in which she was found. 

Somehow Krissy had the good sense to call for help.  Our brother came to her rescue, and took her away from the drugged man that wanted to hold her hostage for her part of the rent for a nasty, roach infested motel room in a seedy part of town.  Kris was given a fresh start with one of our sisters in the Mid West, but before long she headed back out to California and was homeless again in no time.

Several weeks after she had her first debilitating stroke we heard from her in the county hospital. Before long they put her in a taxi and sent her on her way.  Still unable to communicate properly and having extreme difficulty walking, she had a second stroke in the homeless shelter.  Ultimately she ended up back in the hospital, where she suffered a third stroke that they didn't think she'd survive. 

Her will to live and her drive to regain her strength was amazing and inspiring.  In no time she was again ready to be released.  I met with the hospital's social worker and we made arrangements for her to collect Social Security Disability and obtain appropriate housing for someone in her condition.  Before long she was living in a group home with a loving caretaker who fixed her charges wonderfulhomecooked meals and ensured they took their medications as prescribed.  

Kris lived in the group home for the past two years and did pretty well.  Eventually her son graduated high school and was permitted to come live at the same place.  We'd talk on the telephone every once in awhile, which was difficult because her speech was greatly affected. 

I don't know how she managed to purchase cigarettes on her limited income, but she continued to smoke, despite the doctor's warnings, and the concern of her family and friends.  I knew the danger and had talked with her doctors.  She was at extreme risk of suffering a fatal stroke due to her high blood pressure, which increased with each cigarette she put to her mouth.  Regardless of what any of us said, she continued with her nicotine habit. 

Today I received a call from her and we managed to catch up on a few things.  She had moved to her father's house up north, and her step-mother was going to be her paid caregiver.  I was excited for her that she was now in the care of family. 

Of course I had to ask the question that every smoker dreads..........

Me:  Kris, are you still smoking?  

Her: Noooooooooooo! 

Me:  Oh my gosh!  Krissy I am so proud of you for stopping!      How long has it been since you smoked?

Her: Yessssssssstttttuuuurrdddaaaay!

God love her...It's a start!

 

Dyin' to go there.........

Since yesterday was the 1st anniversary of my father’s passing and I visited “him“ at the cemetery, this topic just seems appropriate.

 

Life and Death

My family has spent a lot of time visiting cemeteries. With Papa’s interest in our family’s genealogy and history in general, it was inevitable that we’d spend a significant part of our annual vacations visiting graveyards of long dead relatives and various famous and some pretty infamous historical characters.

Every summer we’d head to Eastern Oklahoma and Arkansas to make the obligatory cemetery rounds and pay our respects to our ancestors and in some cases, descendants whose lives were cut tragically short. Papa had at least one son buried in the Indian “Camp Creek” cemetery and a marker for the other son who was “buried at sea.” There were generations of Newman and Riley family members buried in sunken graves shaded by ancient oak trees. Markers and headstones worn by weather and time. Decoration Day flower arrangements soiled by the red Oklahoma dirt. Ashes to ashes. Dust to dust. Uncles, Aunts and cousins.

At the Salisaw cemetery was Papa’s young half-sister who died as a child in a horrific car accident with her father at the wheel. Muldrow cemetery held “Mama” Spencer, my great-grandmother. Many a time my Grandma Jessie stood at her grave and shed tears of sorrow, as if her death had just happened, instead of years before. “I miss my mama so much!” she’d cry. You never get over the loss of your mama she said. “Jessie, Do you see the angels?“ said Mama Spencer before taking her last breath. Grandma Jessie had sisters and brothers buried there as well. They all had their stories. Some died in infancy. Some too soon as adults, and all before her; the eldest.

It was during those times that I came to know my family’s colorful history. The successful suicide of my paternal grandfather after many unsuccessful attempts. His never ending grief at the loss of Brenda in the accident while he was driving. The Chitwoods, buried in Arkansas, who never acknowledged their illegitimate granddaughter. Their son, buried in Texas, who fathered the girl, and loved her mother to his dying day, even though they never married. Her picture found in his wallet after he died, would prove it.

The war heroes. Family members fighting on both sides of the Civil War. “Change of life babies.” Surprise! The Aunt who tried to extort money from a kidnap victim’s family, even though she had nothing to do with the crime. Tales of the boys hiding up in the trees to watch as she snuck off to be alone with her boyfriend. The great grandmother who fell to her death from a runaway horse and buggy. “Didn’t everyone think Grandpa pushed her off ?” Papa would ask his mother.

The children understood the routine. We visited all the “live” relatives and all the “dead ones.” All of ’em. We remembered. We learned. Heading into Grandma’s house one afternoon after an all day cemetery marathon, she said to us….Did you go to all the cemeteries?” My little brother who was about 9 years old promptly groaned…”No we passed one!” We needed a bumper sticker that read…This car stops at all graveyards!” ”Hey“ I‘d joke with the kids when they‘d had enough, “Don't you know people are just dyin’ to go there?”

Then to the folks that weren't kin. Once we stood at Charles “Pretty Boy” Floyd’s grave, while my grandmother recalled her younger days as a neighbor to Pretty Boy and his family. “Public Enemy Number 1” was a folk hero to the Oklahoma people who dubbed him their Robin Hood, for his actions of stealing from the rich to help the poor. His shiny new headstone replaced the one that was stolen years before and “‘fans“ continued to chip away souvenirs.

In Arkansas, along the river at Wilson Rock, we visited the original resting place of Tiana Rogers, a Cherokee woman who married Sam Houston. Papa shared his knowledge of Tiana’s life, and followed it up with a visit to her final resting place at Fort Gibson. Later we’d visit the museum in Houston, Texas to learn more about Sam’s fascinating life in public service. Judge Isaac “Hanging Judge” Parker’s court, gallows and museum were nearby in Fort Smith, and by visiting we learned the fate of many of the lawless in Indian Territory who faced the judge and ended up in the local cemeteries.

I’m not so sure that my oldest children and younger brother’s will remember those times with Papa, but I hope they do. Maybe this entry will spark a few hidden memories and they‘ll be thankful for the special times in their youth.  It is now the time in their lives when they are begining to bury their ancestors.  I hope one day they will visit those resting places with their kids and share the stories of their lives. Every life has a story and it’s meant to be told and cherished for generations.

This story is part of mine, in honor of Papa. 

In Loving Memory-One Year Ago

                         John Morgan Newman

                              January 29, 1936-August 25, 2004

School Shopping!

Experience is a hard teacher because she gives the test first, the lesson afterwards.               

                                               ~Unknown

 

Today we will tour another private school to consider if Ab doesn't get accepted to the art academy.  This school may be the best after all, considering she's been pretty spoiled and sheltered all her life.  This type of rural environment that's about 3 hours North of us, with all of its simplicity will certainly build character.  Here's info from their website: 

Paul Squibb, a Kent School alumnus and Harvard graduate, and his wife, Louise, founded Midland School in 1932, believing that the essentials of a good education are a student, a teacher, and an idea.

Beyond being a college preparatory boarding school, Midland was created to be a small, rural community that relies on the work of its inhabitants to meet its basic needs. Conceived in the midst of the Depression, these ideals still form the center of the school's philosophy, and every student who earns the privilege to attend Midland will assume not only a great deal of responsibility, but a great tradition of service.

In a world of increasing complexity, Midland School's objective is both timely and straightforward--to foster in young people a strong, lively intellect and impeccable character. A splendid physical setting and the unique opportunities afforded by a twenty-four hour day, seven day week boarding school provide a community in which both students and their teachers live together, bound by the tenets of self-reliance, minimal consumption, and closeness to nature.

The School is a non-profit organization that is governed by a 16-member board.  The estimated value of Midland's property is $15,000,000 and the school's growing endowment is currently approaching $4,000,000.  Annual giving generally yields $300,000 for the school, the bulk of which helps fund Midland's substantial financial aid. Certainly, Midland's budget and use of financial resources looks nothing like other boarding schools, and we pride ourselves in putting our limited funds into people and program, rather than new structures. It is the hope of the school that our students inherit some of these lessons in frugality, and generosity.

Sounds exactly like what this child needs!  Wish us luck! 

Now, I am off to roll her lazy fanny outta that bed!

Bumper Snickers

 

Be Counterculture. Raise your own kids.

 

As I made my way through the grocery store parking lot to run in and grab a bottle of cranberry juice, I saw the above message on a bumper sticker. It just about stopped me dead in my tracks, but considering why I needed the cranberry juice, I hurried on about my business.

Now that’s a novel concept, I thought to myself.

Then I immediately began to experience a heroic sized guilt trip for even considering placing my child in ::gasp:: boarding school.

I thoroughly beat my self up and questioned my decision all the way home. By the time I walked in the door, I wanted to turn my cranberry juice “cocktail” into the real thing with a big shot of vodka. But I didn’t. I just cried instead.

What kind of mother sends her kid to boarding school? Am I throwing in the towel? Letting someone else “raise” my kid? Is this really the best thing for my child? Shouldn’t I be able to handle a 13 year old? Geez. (Give me a convicted murderer any day.)

Once bitten-twice shy they say. After Bubba‘s escapades, I am just not willing to take any chances with this remaining wild Indian. So, I have made up my mind (again), she’s going. That is, as long as she’s accepted by one of the two schools to which we‘ve applied.

In fact, she better pray that she gets accepted by the artsy school. This second one is a lot tougher. They make ’em do “chores” and chop firewood.

Imagine that.

 

Attitude is Everything!

If attitude is everything, let’s just say Ab fully displayed a poor one when we toured the private school on Thursday.

She looked the picture of cool indifference, with arms crossed in front of her, tight jawed with one word answers like, “I dunno.” to open-ended questions posed by the young Admissions Dean as she provided us an in-depth tour of the very prestigious school. A full scholarship was waiting in the wings for my Native American artist-child who was clearly told that they want students who want to be there. In fact, she said they recruit students from all over the world for their student population of just 300.

I explained that Ab was really shy in new social situations, which is true, however I am not sure that she fooled the Admissions Dean who has a Master’s Degree in Psychology. I came clean and told the Dean that Ab was going to go to boarding school whether it was there or somewhere else, so I’m sure that it was an extremely scary proposition to her, hence the attitude.

I also explained the two significant losses Ab experienced in the past year and a half, which affected her greatly. When asked about her grades, and her plans to apply herself, again Ab wasn’t convincing. I was becoming horrified, giving her the “evil eye” every chance I got, and I was sure that the whole process was a HUGE waste of everyone’s time. Especially mine.

My frustration was evident by the time we got back to the Admission’s office, where the Dean reviewed her transcripts of the past five years. I again resorted to begging for mercy by asking for her honest opinion as to Ab’s chances for acceptance there. Surprisingly, she told me they were low on 9th graders, and that while it was fully up to the admissions committee, she felt on a scale of 1 to 10 with 10 being “absolute” that Ab was about a 7 to 8 for admittance.

You could have knocked me over with a feather! And…the pessimist that I am makes me say, “I will believe it when I see it!” Certainly, I am not holding my breath. If anyone’s interested in placing a bet, please let me know. In the meantime I have requested another week off work, which was granted, to continue looking for other options.

Weekend Assignment #73

Our Blogfather, John Scalzi has given us another weekend assignment.......

This sunday marks the second anniversary of the official beginning of AOL Journals, and this year has seen some exciting changes, including the addition of the AIM Blogs to our community. To celebrate another year of AOL Journalers doing their thing (along with the other anniversary things planned by AOL-J members themselves), I thought bring the Weekend Assignment into play.

Weekend Assignment #73: From your own AOL Journal or AIM Blog, pick your own favorite entry from the last year (from 8/21/04 onward). Link to it in the comment thread below, so we can all see what it was. You can alternately, of course, create a new entry where you link to your favorite entry, but that seems a bit overly complicated. Linking directly to your favorite entry will be fine. If you want to include any thoughts on the entry in your comment, well, that would be great, too.

If you don't have an AIM Blog or AOL Journal, don't fret: Just pick your favorite entry from your own site in the same time frame and leave a link.

 

Here's mine.  I am not sure if it's my absolute favorite, but as I am approaching the first anniversary of my Papa's death...August 25th, it just means the most right now.  I think you'll see why. 

http://journals.aol.com/cw2smom/WearinMyHeartonMySleeve/entries/501

Who I Am-Black and White

They say you can tell a lot about a person by what is on their bookshelf.  What does this tell you about me?

Please link to the rest of the Round Robins to see what they express through their photos for this week's theme; Who Am I-Black and White.

1. Patrick  http://astopatwilloughby.blogspot.com

2. Alan   http://journals.aol.com/botdotdotdot/F-Stop

3. Renee  http://journals.aol.com/acyrlicstains/publish/  

4. Dawn  http://journals.aol.com/auburndawn/DawnsDrivel/  

5. Lisa  http://journals.aol.com/cw2smom/WearinMyHeartonMySleeve/  

6. Danielle  http://journals.aol.com/danielled1/Everybodyknows  

7. Deb  http://journals.aol.com/SassyDee50/SassysEYE  

8. Nancy  http://journals.aol.com/nhd106/Nancyluvspix/  

9. Aunt Nub  http://journals.aol.com/montaukny/FoolsParadise  

10. Phinney  http://journals.aol.com/geminiwilder/Paragon/  

11. Monica  http://journals.aol.com/photographybymon/Mamarazzi/  

12. Karen  http://journals.aol.com/mavarin/MusingsfromMavarin/

13. Carly http://journals.aol.com/ondinemonet/Ellipsis  

14. Derek http://journals.aol.com/deveil/PictureoftheDay  

15. Marie http://journals.aol.com/mariebm56/PhotographsMemories/entries/742  

16. Celeste http://journals.aol.com/csandhollow/Mydayandthoughts/  

17. Steven http://journals.aol.com/sepintx/sometimesphotoblog/  

18. Kat http://journals.aol.com/mskatdabrat/FromEveryAngle/  

19. Betty  http://journals.aol.com/rap4143/MyDayMyInterests/  

20. Becky http://journals.aol.com/ryanagi/Wherelifetakesyou  

21. Tess  http://journals.aol.com/tc01hm/FirstDigitalPhotos/  

22. Mary http://journals.aol.com/alphawoman1/Alphawomansblog/

23. Chris http://journals.aol.com/jeroldssis/ItsAllAboutMeIthink/entries/108

24. Robbie http://journals.aol.com/krobbie67/RobbiesRantsRaves/entries/2120
   

A little good news.........

Ab and I will tour the private school for the arts on Thursday!  They have a full-tuition scholarship available for a Native American student so we are keeping our fingers crossed!  What a blessing that would be to have this incredible opportunity all paid! 

Today and tomorrow we will take digital photos of her art work and photos to create a portfolio to take with us for the tour and interview!  That should be fun in itself!   Pictures later!   

Ok Cupid Test Results-Which Looney Toon Character are You?

Here are my online test results from Ok Cupid...

 

Porky Pig! You scored 28 Aggression, 100 Sophistication, and 42 Optimism! Non-aggressive, possibly shy, dapper, well-mannered, and likely far too hard on yourself, you are the prototypical conscientious friend who too often gets taken advantage of. Generally you don’t like to make a fuss and are more or less adverse to risk-taking. There are those out there who make entire careers out of manipulating people like you, and you should be very weary of them. Regardless, try taking a few risks and definitely stick up for yourself more. Maybe quit your safe but boring job, or ask that special person out. You are someone of high moral character and probably deserve far more out of life than you are settling with.


My test tracked 3 variables- How you compared to other people your age and gender:

You scored higher than 18% on Aggression You scored higher than 81% on Sophistication You scored higher than 27% on Optimism

Link: The Which Looney Tune Are You Test written by coolguy3000 on OkCupid Free Online Dating

School Days and Such......

Ab is a very gifted, artistic child.  Music, photography, poetry and art of any kind.  While music is her absolute passion, visual art is running a close second in her colorful world.   

Her 8th grade teacher was an amazing multi-media artist and she shared her love of art with her students.  She really sparked an interest in Abbie with lessons on Escher and Georgia O'Keefe.  It's a toss up on who is her favorite.  She loves geometric designs and impressionistic works, especially modern art. 

Right now she's outside trying to catch the perfect shot of lightning with her camera, while I am hoping she doesn't get a real life lesson in the electrifying properties of the universe. 

Recently, my favorite times with Ab have been watching her discover her world with her amazing abilities as a photographer.  Yesterday I framed her Tatiana photograph to show her just how good it looks and I believe I got my point across.  It looks fantastic in a matted frame!

So, in my internet research to find a boarding school for her, I found one a couple of hours from here that specializes in the arts, music, theatre and dance.  We sat together at the computer screen and read all about what this academy offers and checked out the slide shows of the incredible art the students have created.  Ab then became excited at the possibility of attending a school with such a unique environment for learning.  She said, "Mom, that's way better than the high school here!"  I've put in a call to see if we can take a tour this week while I am off work.   

It's shockingly expensive, but they do offer some financial assistance so I will see if we qualify.  I want to give her the opportunity to discover her talent, improve her self-esteem and make learning fun and exciting along with kids who are interested in the same things.  Otherwise, I am afraid the lack of structure, the large classes and drug activity in our public high school will be her downfall. 

I am not about to let that happen.     

 

 

  

Oh...Where's the Innocence?

In my previous entry I mentioned some issues with the girl child. 

Suffice it to say that there were some serious problems that resulted in the arrest of a 20 year old man for several felony counts. Oh the tangled web we weave with deceit.  She looks older than 13 and she chose to lie, so there have been many lives affected.  There are also arrests pending for other young adults (men) who were involved with some of Ab's 12 year old friends, who also look older than their tender age.  Still, none of them look like anything other than jail bait and that's what it got them.  Idiots, plain and simple.

It's been a horrifying week and I am not sure where to go from here.  I have to protect her from herself and her risky behavior.  The research I have done leads me to believe that she is at a very high risk for continuous and future behavioral issues and I have to change the collision course.  It's causing me to do some serious thinking about what's next in the form of schooling, friends and homelife. 

Sending her to public school here in this town is likely to cause her to seek the same path as Bubba.  Since her behavior is just becoming an issue, perhaps a challenging school with incredible programs and activities will help her to turn her life around.  My work schedule leaves her without the appropriate supervision needed at this stage of her life.  There are no full time private schools in this area for high school age students.    

I attended a retirement seminar last Thursday and I am looking at May 1st to begin my official retirement.  And, it can't get here fast enough. It's a possibility that I will be able to burn some vacation time for a few weeks prior to calling it quits.  If I were retired, it is a possibility that I could home school or drive her to a school down the mountain.  Right now that is impossible, so I am considering a boarding school for her freshman year.  Not the kind of boarding school exclusively for troubled teens, but those that are college prep who take underachieving kids.  Boarding school is terribly expensive, but I think I could manage it by really changing my spending habits, if they have monthly payment options.

Ab sat down with me and we looked at several schools that have outstanding arts and computer programs, one in Northern California and one in the southern part of the state.  I will be off work next week on "vacation" to get all this figured out.  Please, keep us in your prayers. 

 

Some Good News....

Trish recently joined Weight Watchers.  She lost 4 pounds the first week on the Flex Plan, which is basically eating anything you want, as long as you don't exceed your daily allotted points.  Well, there are a few extra points to play with throughout the week, but we're talking just about an extra day's worth that you can fudge on as needed.  The point value for just about every type of food known to man is listed in a handy, take along book.  There's even a book that contains the point values of a variety fast food and some decent restaurants like Applebees.  Applebees even has a Weight Watcher's menu, listing the points for their entrees! 

As I watched Trish eat a variety of foods all day long, and found out that she lost 4 pounds that first week, my interest was sparked.  So, last Thursday, I tagged along and joined up.  I just had to give it a try. 

I was tired of my low carb diet and had started to fall of the wagon.  I managed to keep off the 20 lbs that I lost while recuperating from my surgery, but I was beginning to feel deprived, especially after seeing what Trish was enjoying.  Fruit.  My gosh she was eating fruit.  A no-no on the low carb diet. 

Soooooo, I have been enjoying my 26 point daily allowance and I am eating like crazy.  Fruit.  McDonald's Happy Meal Cheeseburger and Fries, Cereal and Milk.  Snack Well Cookies.  Shrimp salad.  If this is dieting, it's my kind of diet.  All it takes is portion control and better food choices. 

And.....tonight was my first weigh-in and drum roll please...........

I LOST ONE and a HALF POUNDS! 

Pride or Problem

History repeating itself? 

It was a very short night.  I will try to sleep tonight.  If I can.  It's so scary.  Parenting is so tough.

A troubled teen.........

Sex?  Drugs?  Alcohol?  Sneaking out in the middle of the night?

"You can be your Mom's pride or problem." the Deputy told her last night. 

More later..................

17 years ago today...........

Seventeen years ago today..........8/8/88.........I quit smoking. 

Cold turkey.  Went to bed the night before and woke up to becoming a non-smoker!  It was tough.  One of the toughest things I have ever accomplished. But I did it! 

I loved smoking.  I bought in to the hype of the sophisticated woman style of cigarettes that they advertised....long, sexy Virginia Slims. 

Pepsi and cigarettes were my only vices in life back then.  ::Big Sigh::

I miss those cigarettes at times, but never enough to pick one up again.  I still drink the Pepsi, but it's Diet Pepsi now, and sometimes it's Caffeine Free Diet Pepsi to keep my heart from fluttering too much.  Damn, I live a boring life!  

Which reminds me of a joke my Papa used to tell.......

There was this old woman who stood on a corner every day, beating a drum and loudly testifying to the change in her life since she found the Lord....

She said, "I used to smoke....I used to drink....and I used to fornicate....NOW all I do is stand on this here corner and beat this damn drum!"  

Goodnight all!  :)

This and That.......

The above photos are of the kittens we are "fostering" until they are adopted by someone who contacts our local Humane Society, who will refer them to us.  Ab rescued four beautiful kittens who were abandoned by their stray mama, right down the street from us.  They appear to be 3-4 weeks old and are doing just fine so far.  One of the kittens was already adopted by one of our neighbors and Ab is just beggin' to keep the furry black one that she's named Wednesday.  I am partial to "Spot" who is named for his big black spot markings.  But, we are going to have to find homes for these precious little babies, because my 3 adult cats are very opposed to the little intruders in their space. It's hard to believe that my spoiled "kittens".....that I rescued from the prison, will be a year old on August 23rd.  How time flies! 

On a positive note, the protesters scheduled to make an appearance at the funeral of one of our local soldiers killed in Iraq, did not show up on Saturday after all.  I don't know what happened, but I am pleased that they didn't mar the somber event with such idiotic nonsense. 

The "church's" telephone number was posted on the web comment section of the Bakersfield Californian and I don't doubt that a few riled up, flag waving, American truck drivin' Republican Dust Bowl Okies made their opinions known at the church's headquarters.

Bakersfield is known nationally for it's assertive police department and a very capable Sheriff's department and they said they were prepared to make a very visable presence at the funeral. In fact, it's a possibility that the protestors heard about all of the stupid criminal-types that like to come up from Los Angeles and rob our banks, mistakenly thinking that Bakersfield is just a sleepy, cow town with a Barney Fife deputy.  Every one of 'em have been wrong.  DEAD wrong!  

So, instead, the soldier's family was greeted by a huge turnout by supportive friends and the public, who also lined the streets with flags and banners to honor him as the procession passed to the cemetery.  His young widow and parents must be extremely proud and touched by the outpouring of support.  May he rest in peace.  

Ab gets her very first pair of contacts tomorrow!  Since she would never wear her glasses, I am sure that she will find the world to be a much brighter place now that she can finally see!  Hey, it may even help her with her school work!  Good grades?  We'll see.  One thing that the doctor told her is that her vision is soooo bad, that she's going to have to wear glasses or contacts to drive.  Maybe that will be an incentive to wear them. 

Today is "Gotcha Day" for our family.  It's a day that we celebrate the day that Bubba and Ab became "officially adopted."  Ab was off doing things with her girlfriends, so we will have a belated celebration.  Bubba telephoned me the other night from Oklahoma, taking about possibly joining the Army.  Progress there. 

Additionally, today would be my late sister's 50th birthday. She died 11 years ago as a result of a rare form of Breast Cancer, called Inflammatory.  Kim was a wonderful, fun-loving and beautiful soul whose life was ended too soon.  I planned an entry to honor her today, but I didn't get it done.  So instead, Happy Birthday Peaches!  I love and miss you Sis! 

Well, I am off to get some much needed beauty sleep. 

Thinkin' of Kat and Pam!   

 

This Beats All!

This article from our local newspaper, The Bakersfield Californian, tells about a "Church Group" which plans an "anti-gay" protest at the upcoming military funeral of one of our young soldiers who was recently killed in Iraq.  Ironic that this man died serving our country which allows us the freedom so idiots like this can protest.

 

Group draws local backlash for plan to protest funeral

Widow of soldier killed in Iraq asks mourners to ignore church's message

By STEVEN MAYER, Californian staff writer
e-mail: smayer@bakersfield.com

Posted: Thursday August 4th, 2005, 10:30 PM
Last Updated: Friday August 5th, 2005, 5:00 PM

Members of Bakersfield's gay community said they will not mount a counter-protest on Saturday when members of a controversial Kansas church are expected to picket the funeral of a soldier killed in Iraq.

Army Pfc. Ramon Villatoro Jr., 19, of Bakersfield, died July 24 when a roadside bomb detonated near his vehicle. Three other U.S. soldiers also died in the blast.

"We think the soldier should have a dignified funeral," local gay activist Whitney Douglas-Weddell said Thursday. "It's bad enough that he was killed. Now the family has to put up with this hate group showing up."

Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka, which operates two anti-gay Web sites, claims America is being punished by God for its tolerance of homosexuality, resulting in the deaths of soldiers from roadside bombs.

Members of the church have been demonstrating at soldiers' funerals across the country. They have carried signs that read, "God Hates America," and "Fags are worthy of death."

Bakersfield police said they will have a visible presence at the funeral.

Amanda Villatoro, Villatoro's pregnant widow, has invited the public to attend the 9 a.m. Mass at Our Lady of Guadalupe Church on East California Avenue. She asked mourners to pay no attention to the protesters, no matter how hateful their message.

In an interview broadcast Thursday afternoon on the "Ralph Bailey Show" on News/Talk 1560 KNZR, Westboro pastor Fred Phelps openly celebrated the deaths of American soldiers serving in Iraq.

"You're a happy man today. Four more Americans died and you're a happy man. You're pleased about that," Bailey said to Phelps.

"Absolutely, and you ought to be," Phelps said. "Look, the veracity of God's involved here. He hasn't done near the damage to this nation that he ought to do and that he will do. This nation's got to repent."

But ministers and clergy from mainstream denominations condemned Phelps' message Thursday.

The Rev. Craig Harrison, pastor of St. Francis Church in Bakersfield, a Catholic congregation, compared Phelps' selective use of Scripture to Charles Manson's use of the Bible to support murder.

"What they are professing has nothing to do with Christ's faith," Harrison said of the Kansas church.

Thomas Calderon, a Vietnam combat veteran and a member of Veterans of Foreign Wars Post 97, said he's disgusted by Westboro's plans to demonstrate at the funeral.

"I think this gentleman, this soldier was doing what he was told. That's what soldiers do, right or wrong," Calderon said. "These bigots are totally irresponsible and ignorant of what this country stands for.

"It hurts me that a young mother has to be subjected to this at her own husband's funeral," he said.

"If these people were in the military, they would be committing treason. These are statements against humanity."

Westboro Baptist Church teachings

The Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka, Kan., makes its position clear on its Web site. The church preaches that God is intentionally killing American soldiers in Iraq because America is too tolerant of gays.

Here are some of the church's teachings in its own words:

• "God has become America's terrorist."

• "Thank God for the bombing of London's subway."

• "Thank God for IEDs (improvised explosive devices, also known as roadside bombs)."

• The Web site twists the name of Our Lady of Guadalupe Church, calling it "Our Lady of Sodom Church."

Gays are not the only Americans vilified by the Kansas church. Jews, Catholics, Episcopalians, blacks and other groups also are targeted.

SOURCES: godhatesfags.com (the Web site for Westboro Baptist Church) and the Anti-Defamation League

From the commentary section asking for reader's opinions:

Protest at a military funeral?

Military funerals such as the one Saturday for Army Pfc. Ramon Villartoro Jr., 19, of Bakersfield, who was killed July 24 in Iraq, are a time to grieve, honor and remember a man who gave his life in the service of our country.

But the controversial Westboro Baptist Church of Topeka, Kansas, thinks Villartoro's funeral is a time for them to protest the bombing of their own church in 1995 which in its view is a terrorist attempt to stop its anti-gay preaching.

Westboro, which is led by minister Fred Phelps, a disbarred attorney, claims 20,000 such protests in the last decade as a way to preach its main philosophies as espoused on its websites, godhatesfags.com and godhatesamerica.com

Villatoro's 19-year-old pregnant widow, Amanda, advises that people should not pay the least attention to this out-of-towner protest. (Amanda Villatoro is one smart lady!) 

Is it any surprise that Fred Phelps is a disbarred attorney?  What a rotten excuse for a human being.