The boarding school child, home for the holiday, and her "overly-positive", yet "demanding" mother are butting heads.
Ok, so in my child rearing efforts, I have tried to teach my kids that there are more appropriate ways to deal with their anger than to yell across a crowded mall, "I HATE YOU! YOU EFFFFFFINNNN BIOTCHES!" to a couple of teenage bullies that have "tried to ruin" her life.
But a kid can only take so much of being called and referred to by the horribly derogatory terms and names that can deeply cut a fragile soul. Add in the techno ability to post such things on the internet at a popular "My Space" site, and the lightening quick aspect of the email and you can torture a young woman who doesn't even attend school with you anymore.
High tech harassment.
Bullying at a much more sophisticated level.
Right or wrong, hopefully, spewing pent up emotions at her tormentors released the anger that she'd turned inward, causing her to inflict visible injuries on her beautiful body.
If only they could see the cuts bleed.
As Jesus said, "Father, forgive them for they know not what they do."
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I'm so sorry. I hope the 2 of you get some good time together this vacation.
ReplyDeleteThis is the worse age for her. Kids are very cruel.
ReplyDeleteI know this isn't going to help much, but ALL kids go thru this.
They learn to wear a mask, they learn to deal with it. Unfortunately people get hurt in the process.
{{{{AB}}}}
{{{LISA}}}
Enjoy the weekend with her.
Happy Thanksgiving!
Marie
My Mom always told me "Girls are SO MEAN to each other." It's true. Girls can be so hateful. However, it's also their insecurities talking, perhaps Ab would like to know that they are actually JEALOUS of her ... because they lack something she has! Good luck, and I hope you both have a wonderful holiday together.
ReplyDelete~~Kath~~
Oh, you must feel so frustrated to have her helpless in the face of their cruelty. Her strong reaction to them, well, heck, something's gotta give now and again.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy your holiday together and know that Ab will be a better person in the end if she can hang in there in the now.
My daughter is here with me and reading over my shoulder. The first thing she said was, "Girls are such bitches," and then "I'll be glad to some ass kicking for her. I have some big friends." I understand that anger. God bless you both. That you see forgiveness as a good thing shows your strength. I float back and forth from there.
ReplyDeleteI know I'm supposed to espouse the good examples of grown-ups, but all I could think when I read your entry was: "ALRIGHT AB! Go, girl, go!!!" Obviously the kids are jeolous because Ab is attending a fancy, private school, and she's living like a college student in a dorm, away from her mother, which means a lot to kids around Ab's age (and Em's mind you), and she is studying her love - art! What kid wouldn't be green with envy. But don't you worry none, Ab's bound to blossom into an incredible woman of the world with all you've given her. Happy Thanksgiving to you both. P.S. I was so happy to read of Flyboy's return - my very best to him and his bride, and please pass along Em's and my graditute for his service to our country.
ReplyDeleteOh, Lisa...I'm so sorry Ab is still putting up with bull**** from her former school mates. What a bunch of freakin' little buttholes. School is MUCH nastier than it was when I was a kid. I think the boarding school is probably a great place for her. I think she feels much better about herself there.
ReplyDeleteHugs to you and Ab... Lisa :-]
Oh, I am so sorry. Teen girls can be so horrible to other girls...
ReplyDeleteIt is so hard to see kids in pain physical or otherwise. I am so sorry that she cuts herself. There is help, if you have not already talk to your Dr. I know of three people that have this problem.
ReplyDelete